What is Gender - Personal reflection and experiences

It is my personal opinion and reflection and I have no intention to hurt any gender. I am a “Man” in case you are thinking that this is definitely written by a woman. Oh in case you are wondering I am not a student of gender studies either, I am a business economic student, oh! Yes right I may have some “economic motives” behind this.

The inspiration of writing this blog comes from two of my very close friends article. The article not just inspired me to do things differently, but also made me think about gender inequality. Thank you my fabulous friends! 

There are only 12 fortune 500 companies that are headed by women, I wonder “why”, you can count the number woman billionaires on Forbes list on your fingers, I wonder “why”, everyone wants to be Bill Gates and Steve Jobs, and I wonder “why”. Having said that gender studies is not just about women, that is a misconception. I guess that is why I have never met a man who is taking gender studies. Gender study is itself marginalized by the society as the field of study about plight of women. This is sheer out of ignorance and stereotype!  

What do I know about gender studies, may be nothing, actually, I have no formal education and background in gender studies, but do we really need to study this as a subject? We just need to keep our eyes and ears open to figure out how gender plays a huge role in our day-to-day life. In my friend Charelle words “Gender is linked to everything, and everything is linked to gender”, if you just for a minute analyze your daily routine and habits you will realize how everything in your life is influenced by your gender - the clothes we wear, what we drink, kind a car we drive, what we eat, everything is affected by gender stereotype created by the society. My understanding of gender is based on my personal experience and observation of events around the world.

So what is”Gender”? Gender is something that separates us anatomically, but in today’s world gender has a different meaning – a word that dictate us what you are supposed to do, how you act, how you react, do’s and don’ts. oh! “It is feminine” “it is masculine”; this is what society thinks gender is. Who define what is feminine and what is masculine? And what are these terms anyways? We all feel the pain, we all smile, we all cry, and we all come in this world the same way. So why this question!

Before coming to this country I have never heard of gender studies as an academic stream. I guess in my country we have not only marginalized woman, but also made sure that they never even realize that they are marginalized. Women don’t even realize that they are discriminated based on their gender, oh you are a girl – you are supposed get married as soon as possible, have a family, cook, and clean. And most of the women accepts that due to our so called “society norms”. Why not you let them decide what they suppose to do, marriage, family, cooking and cleaning is not the only thing in their lives.   

Gender in my personal opinion in this marginalized world is about how we are treated and distinguished from each other based on our gender, what is expected from us and what is acceptable to the society. Kids at the early age were taught about what is expected from their gender.  Why not we teach them what is expected from them to keep the humanity alive and what they can do to make this world a better place.   

While writing this intricate blog, I felt is it right to say this or not, then I said to myself who is anybody else to decide what is right or wrong I will write whatever I feel like, we all have freedom of speech. But again freedom is dictated by the society and boundaries are well defined.

Gender should only be anatomical difference and nothing else.

I may have said so many things that someone find offensive, but then again why it is offensive, are your sure your understanding is not influenced by the society and their so called “norms”. If you still feel offended then accept my apologies.

I want to thank my friend Emmy (the title is based on your observation that my perception should not be influenced by anybody, but me)  and Charelle for inspiring me! Love your article!

Time well spent today!

Another New Year – What I have lost and found last year - Precious Year 2012!

A New Year is like a blessing - live it to the fullest

For the last 3 years I was spending my New Year day on streets of New York, not like a homeless guy, but enjoyed the vibrant culture and colors, street performances, chatting with strangers, hot coffee outside Macy’s, shivers at times, smile and laugh with strangers, loud sound of party blowers, people holding plaques “Free Hugs” “Don’t forget to smile” “Lord is with us”, street vendors selling some of the coolest stuff, kids dragging their parent to M&M and ToyRus stores, people lost in city maps, couples asking strangers to click their pictures, traffic cop waiting for 18 hrs shift to get over, an old lady looking at the empire state building and reminiscing how it looked when she was young, and a young man observing all this while waiting in the queue for “Rockettes” dance performance at the most beautiful theatre “Radio City”. Another last day of the year in New York fast paced life, the only day when the city lost its momentum and slow down to enjoy each and every bit of being human. New York is a city where you can find yourselves in thousands of pictures taken by strangers from all over the world, like I have hundreds of strangers in my photo albums.

 I missed all that mixed bag of emotion here in Prince George on my first Canadian New Year Eve!

The year 2012 was a wonderful year for me both personally and professional, I started my new position as a Research Fellow for the university, made some friends for life, bonded with old and lost friends, moved to a new and wonderful place with amazing roommates, had amazing summers with friends, travelled to some of the most beautiful cities in Canada, met some really amazing and crazy individuals– don’t ask their names some of you know what I am talking :D, learned some important lessons. Although there were days when I wanted to go back home and hug my Mom and Dad, stay in their arms, hold my little nephew, and see the smile on everyone’s face. There were days when I needed my friends to talk me out and fortunately there were friends like Matt, Greg, Alishia, and Charelle, whom I am indebted. There were friends like Harpuneet and Ashish who were trying to make me laugh. Tried skiing for the first time and rest is history and one of my most read blogs. So many memories I don’t know how many I will be able to recall.

Moments when I had supper at the lake and splashed water……, flying kites and snapped tread - running for the kite, meeting a friend after 5 years, from knowing to liking, ….I think I am getting a poetic, now I am going to stop now.    

Writing this blog brings back all old memories, I have no regret, I have cherished every moment of happiness and sorrow. Bad days make us realize the true worth of good days.

Thanks for being my friend! Cheers to New Year and Cheers to New Memories.